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Wheee! At the library. We saw Jan here and Hector and Jan are getting cought up. Jan looks so older now #.# Anywho, it was a long obnoxious walk here. I got all hot -n- icky.. This computer was being a pain and wouldn't let me go on aim. It was rather irritating. Anywho.. Angel was annoying me. She kept flirting with Hector and I almost had to bitch slap her. Sam was being annoying today.. Chu.. I'll update later, I don't feel like it now.
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I finnal realized how to put it on 'friends only' yea.. #.#; Feel kinda sttuuppiiidd.. Nya.. So , sorry for posting three times today ^^
Luv and Cheesecake.
p.s from now on all my entries will be 'friends only'
I mean it this time
--Cindy--
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This was an interesting quiz I found on Dita's journal and decided to take it. My actual update will be later.
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Thursday, March 4th, 2004
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Don't you like my new BG? It's so cool. Now if only I could get rid of the one black box.. Thanks you Magen for help. Oh yes, quick summary: My mom said I could go to megacon again, happy days, had a good day so far, it's nice out side. Okay
Luv and cheesecake
--Cindy--
This is a very quick summary =^^=
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Wednesday, March 3rd, 2004
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My mom returned to her normal Bitchy self. This morning, everything was going fine, I packed my moms lunch, and then of course, as usual, my mom is runing late sense she refuses to get up on time...
And even though she bitches at us when we don't have what were wearing the next day layed out, she spends her usual 15 minutes trying to find something to wear. ¬.¬ Then she began her usual thing on wrinkles in her clothes. Supposidly sense me and Alica always seems to do the laundry wrong, (somehow, we manage to hang up clothes incorectly) she always sees these wrinkles in her shirts and pants which Alicia and I can stare at and not see a single wrinkle where as it's "full of wrinkles" to her.
She began her usual sentences consisting of "fuck" and "half-ass" and "dumb ass", such as " 'I don't know why you guys fucking do anything, it's not like you do anything, if you do you just half-ass it godamn lazy asses' " I quoth her, (this is even though, as her saint self, she swears she never uses "fuck" or "goddamn") which makes me sink into my usual sad-ness whenever she begins to emotionally abuse me. ( And to anyone who has never experiences emotional abuse, it's much more hurtful that physical abuse.. you'd be surprised. If you don't believe me ask a physchiatrist they will tell you) She then continues her rambling where I walk out and sit on the couch, my back to her. Then somehow, I continue to do things wrong, am a dumbass, and so on.. Yay..
I have to fight the tears, because I've sworn to never let her see me cry, because that would only highten my being a "dumbass" to her. So, I bite my lip and continue on with my day.
Then I get to school.. Hector and Sam cheered me up right away. So, I'm happy now. On the fcat math, there was the usual bunch of stuff I have no idea how to do that deals with graphs and one question was this.. that I actually whispered"What the fuck?" to: "If Sam looks at his watch and it is 8:29 and assuming that his watch is correct, what is the probability that it is 30 seconds past 8:29?" ..................???????
Oki.. Anywho.. lesse.. I actually remembered to have people fill out these surverys I had to have done, even though I already got 10 pts taken off. It's almost the fourth semester, My teachers are talking about final exams. The fourth semester brings two new classes, two the same two diffrent bye bye bell
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Today was the horrible FCAT. We were in there for three and a half hours and my stupid mofo of a teacher wouldn't let anyone leave, and we weren't allowed out during 2nd (taking place of 1st) So I went four hours having to pppppppppppiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii I had to pppppppiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii >< People, do you know my AGONY?! What human could possibley hold in their bials for that long >< After homeroom I had to wait for Hector.. DID HE KNOW MY AGONY?! NO!! I'm sure he wondered when I didn't say goodbye and I ran into the bathroom. Sorry, luv, but did you want me to pi on you?
Oki, after that hilarity, I go to 3rd and guess what? Whoever made the bra where the straps come undone and then you get shorter ones so you can make it to fit a halter top thing is a retard.. It has a lovely tendancy to unhook whenever you move okwardly. So, I had to most lovely experience of spending my time fixing my bra strap with Magen starring at me wondering what the bloody hell I was doing. And it's hot as a mofo in here. I go from freezing cold to undying heat.
Anyway, I'm sure you all got a laugh at my having to pi and my wonderfull bra strap story. Anyway, I'm goona go surf the net, I shall update later if possible.
--Luv and Cheesecake--
--Cindy--
Lookie, I'm back.. Anywho changed my icon back to my old one sense th school computer was being mean adn wouldn't let me upload the one of Mari I had.. So what if my BG is Mari and my icon is Ayumi. ><; Anywho.. I'll fiddle with it later, it's time to go to lunch now
Luv and Cheesecake
--Cindy--
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Lauren or anyone can you guys help me with my journal? I wanted to chang the BG and stuff (as you can see) But it's kinda covered up. If like, anyone can help me I'll give you my password and stuff and you can do it for me because you love me ^-^; OKi-dokili
Luv to all
--Cindy--
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Nya, Megacon is this weekend. I'm so happy that I get to go, and also my dad is sending Alicia and I money (are Japanese sheets never came for christmas) Which is sooo Cool ^^; Lauren said she would let me wear he Black Mage costume. ^^; Yay, I wanna wear a costume, didn't really wanna wear one that wasn't mine, but it's not like I'm ussing her costume to enter a contest, plus it's pure fun. ^^; Looks like everyone is going to Megacon, Lauren, Stephi,Spencer,Alicia,Me,Magen,Kristine,ect.. ^^; Hopefully nothing ocward will happen when people bump into each other. #.#; That would suck monkeys.
Lalalala. Had a bad 11 month aniv. >< Hector and I fought both on Friday and Saturday.
I get to stay afterschool with Hector tomorrow.. Because of that I will forgive it for being Fcat day ^^;
Yesterday was Sam's birthday, didn't get to go to his house though because he only gave us a day's notice and my mom demands a week.
Nya, this girl named Raina who lives down the street from me has been talking to me latley. I stopped talking to her when our parents fought.
I read this article that really struck home with me in the newspaper. It's a new study that overweight teen girls get this ovary syndrome which makes them infertile because of being overweight.. Not it had all the other things in it like heart disease n such, the usual "overweight problems" but no matter how many times I read that stuff it never affected me. When I read the article and discovered I had some of the symptoms, my heart broke. Never before have I wanted to loose weight for a medical reason, it was always because I don't wanna be made fun of or I wanna look good or be able to fit into clothes or wear a bathing suit, but reading that if I stay this way, I won't be able to have a family in the future almost made me cry. I immediantely went outside and played basketball for a little bit and then me and Alicia went for a walk. I want to go for a walk everyday now.
This is something important to me. I'm also trying to eat better.. So everyone at school (my friends at lunch especially) need ot help me out by not giving me that french fry in their chicken basket (pats Harold on the head) Nya nya..
Nya.. Well, there is nothing much I have left to talk about. I shall depart now, if I think of something to post later I shall.
I luv you all
--Cindy--
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Friday, February 27th, 2004
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Whhheee. Magen and I are playing hangman.. #.#; Sorry for lack of update, teacher has been a pain even though he is not our teacher, (nor sub) he likes to say he is. Nya, today is Hector and My 11 month aniv. ^^; One more month shall be a year, DUN DUN DUN. We can go to the movies tomorrow, yay.WHat shall I see? I do not know ^^; Something with an empty movie theater. ^^; What else, nya.. I don't see how Hector and I could do the ring thing I wanted to do. M family has zero money and Megacon is next weekend which we have to go to because Mr. Person gave Dita two tickets. Nya.. I want to buy my friend Sam a present there, too.. So I'm just gonna go to see the Cosplay Contest and maybe get him a Keychain or something.
Sucks being poor, oh how I miss thee Internet and Cable. But, Alas, it is nothing I haven't lived without before. Nyu, I didn't get the internet or cable till I was almost 10, I lost it when I had just turned 14 so.. That was only 4 years. What did I do to past the time then? Nya, yes.. I forgot physical activity.. To bad I'm not allowed to do so. .. Wait... I can.. but playing basketball by myself doesn't seem like to much fun, nya.
Oh well.. this year I've already gotten like ten ibs. bigger than I was last year.. Which would make me 20 ibs bigger than I was in NSC.
Chu. What else.. nya... I'll update when I think of more later.. Okay, I luv you all ::huggles::
--Cindy--
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Friday, February 20th, 2004
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This entry had to die because it was so wide it totaly messed up my journal. Sorry no one gets to look at the preatty rings ^^
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Thursday, February 19th, 2004
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Lululululu! I think I've decided I want to be called Lulu. I mean, I'm a whore like Lulu ^^; She's awesome, and I love magic so.. Lala. I don't think after 15 years everyone would start calling me Lulu though. Why not? Hmm.. I wanna be called Lulu !! ::starts pounding agaisnt the floor like a 3 year old::
Anywho, #1 of Mars was so Kawaii ^^; It was supremem ducki-ness. Oh yes! Well, nothing much to report here. I had a really bad morning.. Arguing with my mom, running late so I couldn't see Hector before school. Chu. Yay. I get to go home and clean my house. Yay.
Hmm.. What esle should I update? Ah, yes, my Bus. Sys. Tech. teacher is soooo retarded..
All I did was ask him what to do when we were done and he went through like three of my letters trying to change stuff, (doing it very slowly, mind you) upon which he had to change back because I was right. ¬.¬` Yea.. Anywho, I guess I'll go now. Bye!
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Wednesday, February 18th, 2004
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I decided that from now on I will make my journal friends only ^^; If your not on my friends list and would like to be added comment, please. Though, I don't think that would be anyone.. But anywho... bye bye
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My AFI shirt is so ssssssseeeeeeexxxxxyyyyyyyyyy ::smothers self in shirt: Oh yes..
::Other Sexy Linkin Park Shirt gets jealous and attacks Cindy and consumes her soul::
@.@;;; I'm a lil crazy! Plus, I'm HYPER
Whhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeee!!!!
I started reading Mars. That is sooooooooo glorious. I had no intention of reading it when Alicia started too, because I didn't want to read it just because I don't want to read everything Alicia does and thus seem like a follower, but I read the 1st one (Still have a few pages left though) And I love it. REI IS SO AWESOME. ^^; It reminds me of Hector and I, because Hector always has all these people he can talk to without a care, and I am the quite person that tries not to make visual contact with anyone. ^^; Sorry, But I do seriously have to compare everything and anything to Hector. ^^; ::huggles Hector:: ^^;
Well, not much more to report on this front! Gonna go surf the net..
Luv and cheesecake
--Cindy--
P.s Thanks Dane for commenting on my sad, lonly, angry post a few posts back ^^; ::huggles Dane::
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Friday, February 13th, 2004
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Nyu.. ::writting while teacher looks away::
I'm so sad today. I have a feaver blister on the left side of my face right next to my lips.. I'm sick.. Hector isn't the happiest person... I went to lunch to visit Alicia and Hector, and hector walked right past me and didn't even see me. I was talking to Alicia when I think Daniella came over to me and was like "Exscuse me.. This is my seat, Yea, my seat move.My seat, my seat." Yea.. That kinda just made me feel like crap. Then in Second, literaly I was the only girl in the class that didn't get a carnation. This one girl next to me was laughing because she doesn't have a BF and she got 7 flowers. That made me feel like shit.
I just fill like fooey. Lesse, what else could go wrong today? I'm hungry and have no money, I spent 10$ yesterday at lunch (Lauren, Dane, Me, Harold, Keri) All shared two chicken baskets. Then I bought two drinks for me and Lauren.. Yea.. And I wasn't suppose to spend any of my money. Great, that will put my mom in this happy mood. Lauren paid me $5 back today, which means I have $15 now. I think I'll just tell my mom I was hungry so I bought lunch.. Yea.. if she yells at me, whats knew? I wanted to get people candy and stuff but I never got the oppurtunity to go the the store.
I also feel bad because no matter how hard I try Hector seems to be closer to all the people I introduced him to. Spencer, Lyssa, Sam and even Alicia than I am. Sense I was in 5th grade I wanted to be friends with Lyssa because I thought she was so smart and awesome (I met her at Alicia's 13th b-day party) Spencer I think is just this great pirky mixture of gheatto-ness, but it seems Hector is friends with them and I am not. Hector even got a valentines day card from Spencer. Yea.. That made me feel like shit. Sam made everyone candy, truffles I think, guess who didn't get one? I think Mike was the only one that ever kinda accepted me and would talk to me and stuff. Which is weird sense I liked him.
Maybe they don't like me because they only know the attetion freak, imateur person I was up untill about this year? I don't know. Maybe I just say these things to make myself feel better. Maybe they don't give me presents because I don't give them one? I try, but usually I am out of money.. And I actually made Spencer, Lyssa, Sam and all of them a x-mas card but I forgot it at home. Well, I guess it's a good thing because I would have felt like shit getting nothing in return. I think by getting everyone nothing it makes me feel better when I receive nothing. Last year on Valentines day was the only exception. I bought candy and shared it with everyone, including Sara, who I vowed to be my mortal enemy and everyone shared candy with me in return. Which is funny because the following year(this one) she called me a bitch straight to Hectors face. You know what he did? Nothing..On my birdthday, the day of the two hour pep rally, I made fuge and cheesecake and shared it with my friends. The only one that gave me a b-day present was Harold and Hector. And Hector doesn't count because he is my BF. Sam gave me an x-mas present, which he actually told me he only did because I gave him an x-mas card,(and i received it about a week after we returned from x-mas break) but I think it's only because he probably bought it for his GF but then they broke up.
Am I really that hard to be friends with? You think I will be closer to the people I was workign closley with for a month during Nummy Sushi and then when we were going to do say yea than my BF who just met them this year. ::smilles pretend happily:: Does no one like me? If they don't won't they please just tell me so I don't wallow in self-pity because I hate it when I do that. That leads me to nothing but deppresion.. which leads me to anger.. which leads me to cutting myself. Or, "accidently" taking to much medicine because I don't feel good. I haven't done that in a long time, though, because I promised Hector I wouldn't. Well, exept for sticking the pin in my arm yesterday.. I feel really selfish now so I think I will go.. Bye bye everyone
It's my fucking journal so I have the right to rant like I did in this post, and to miss spell things when I'm sad or pissed, or to seem like a selfish bitch, so screw me okay? Deal with it
--Cindy--
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Chu, My happy Scoripo moon days died yesterday afterschool. ::sighs:: Hector and I got into a big fight yesterday, I got so peeved at him. He had been ignoring me the entire time afterschool and every time I tried to hug him or see what was wrong he either told me to "stop" or to "go away". Yeah, that made me so overjoyfully happy, you wouldn't believe. ::sniffs:: I felt so bad though, because I think seeing be upset just made him worse. And I was mean, and stubborn, and as a reaction to try and hurt him as much as he hurt me, I took my sister's Auron pin our of her backpack and stuck in my arm. I looked at Hector and smirked while I was doing it, too.
I'm a hatefull bitch. That didn't make him feel any better and I feel really bad. I'm going to try to convince my mom to let him come over after school today. I really miss him, On Wendesday night I didn't get to talk to him, and it was like he wasn't there but worse on Thursday and then when we talked on the phone that night it was either yelling or silence. Ugh, I must update later my teacher is yelling at me
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Thursday, February 12th, 2004
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So happy!! I'm also happy because I'm wearing the shirt Illarie got me for x-mas (like last year.. when I was in 8th) I love it becuase it says "I am confident in my Sexual powers" in Japanese..... Oh yes ::shakes gheatto booty:: I love it.. The only problem is she got it in a medium.. ô.O; No offense Illarie, but do I look like a medium?? I can wear it, it's just tight fitting and I usually don't wear tight fitting clothing, But I am today. I love you anyway Illarie ::huggles Illarie:: ô.ô; Whhhhhheeeeeeee oh yea. Look at my bright Yellow red and black shirt, baby!! ::dances:: Hyper, Hyper, Hyper. I was just reading Spencer's lj and noticed he wrote " ' no one like jon now because he squeezes innocent girls boobs ' " Yea, THAT HURT. SOOO BAD. That was a long time ago though.. Like end of 1st semester. He kept touching Lauren and I's ass and kept trying to grab our chest. That was freaky. I mean.. He's doing this to freshman when He's a senior. When he ripped off my chest (Which is how I can describe it) I was escorted to Alicia, Sam, Lyssa, Spencer, ect. by Harold ::huggles him:: Yup yup then they took care of me ::huggles everyone:: I kinda feel bad though, I think maybe things got out of hand? I did ask him to stop though, but maybe if I had told him to leave me alone or he can't sit with us? I wish he didn't loose Alicia ect. as friends over me. I mean.. Can I blame the guy for being horny? Oh well..
On to better subjects! I get to see my sexy muffin which I want to devour and chain to my bed and rape all the time bf today after school ^^; I also get to spend time with Lauren at detetion!! ^^; Lalalalala! What else? Hmm.... Me and Magen got yelled out for being oin Lj by Mr. James. HOW GAY?! He's not even our real Teacher. He's like "your not sending messages to each other and stuff like that are you? " and I was like "No.. it's live jorurnal." upon which he asked me three times to repeat what I said.¬.¬ And Magen just noticed that we got yelled out when theres kids on freaky car sites -n- stuff.. ô.O; Yea.. Anywho.. whatever. What else? Wow. this is a Long lj entry for having already written an LJ entry today. ô.O; I am a strange typing mo fo Magen, THATS HOW. ^^; (She just asked me how I can type so much on LJ) ô.O; ^^; It's because I'm never on the p.c at home because we don't have internet so I WAS usually on AIM and telling everyone about my day that way, but now I must type it all here. I wonder how many ppl read this? Oh well, I will write because I feel like it!! BWA HAHAHAHA.. Yes... I am hyper, I feel like a bright golden duck of smurphy ness..... ^^;
Anywho, I shall go now. I love you all
p.s here is me playing with alt and #'s.
º.º --> Looks like someone is high
î.î ¦_¦ ò.ò; (147)Oh YES! ô.ò; (9877) <--sexy
¡.¡ (898989) <--Sad crying face. ¤.¤ (91919)<--wide eyes
µ.µ <--WTF? (9254) ¼ <-- Lookie one fourth! (1452) Also (7852)Isn't that cccccccccooooooolll? Yes, I'm special, leave me alone.
±_ (this is where I forget how I did it so I have a half face..)
‡_‡ (01234567) §.§ (123456789) Whhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeee!
Well, I am done now. I love you all!
--Cindy--
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Yyyyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ^^^^^^^^^^__________^^^^^^^^^
I'm so happy, so happy, yes yes!! The thing I was worried about no longer troubles me -^^- Isn't that great? I hate to say this, but it's all because Hector caught my cold. Yes yes, doesn't that seem weird? Oh and Because of the two blemishes now apparent upon my face. Yep, never thought I'd say I was happy about that. So happpppppppyyyyyyy. You have no idea! Lauren, I LOVE your LJ the layout is sooooooooooo ggggggrrrrrrrreeeeeaaaaaattttttttt I feel so happy! I want to buy everyone a cookie @ lunch! I must P-A-R-T-Y!!!!!!! ^^; Ugh, this is weird but ever sense I got really pissed at Lauren last year I haven't been as close to her, but now I'm starting to feel like she is my best friend again. I don't know why. Ugh! Dane, if it wasn't for Lauren, I would have never have talked to you because I thought you were creapy. Alas, You are a person I can trust and I have barley known you. You've been there for me under my time of stress ::huggles Lauren and Dane:: Guess what BITCHES?! IT'S A SCOPIO MOON TODAY AND TOMORROW!!!!!! Know what that means?! I'm HYPPPPERRR and PPPIIIRRRKKKYYY and Oh yes, my butt looks oh so sexy today. ô.O; I feel so hyper, which is strange because I sound like death because of my sickness, BUT OH WELL! Happy Happy Happy!
Lalalalalalala! What else? Did I mention I really loves Lauren's spiffy layout?! You know what It's not spiffy it's SMURPHY!! Oh yes, major duckness there!! ^^; Ugh, tired of typing. What else must I say? Lalalalalalala! Oh well, I'll update laterrrrrrrrrrr.
Luv to all!
--Cindy--
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Wednesday, February 11th, 2004
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Chu. I just had to post these lyrics. ^^ I never knew the english translation.. But this was like the first sogn that reminded me of Hector.. Just the few words I knew.. Anyway, here's the english translation
"Eternally" By Utada Hikaru
You sparkle slightly before my eyes
I can't see anything around me
Where are we?
Please don't disappear yet
Into the background that just started to bustle
I can't hear anything anymore
But I can feel you breathe
It's so unlike me that it's surprising, but I expect
Just a bit to come out of this whimsical development
I wanna be here eternally
I want to stay like this, as we stare at each other
I can feel you close to me
I can't stay by your side forever
This moment alone will remain, eternally
In the short break before I leave to battle
I want to spend it with you
We made a promise for the next time we could meet
Can you hear me breathe?
Everyone has times when they feel moved
By developments which aren't suprising
I wanna be here eternally
At a place where no one can find me
I can see you're all I need
I don't need any help until tomorrow
Even this moment must be just a fantasy
I can feel you close to me
Even if I can't return to that place
These feelings alone will remain, eternally
I wanna be here eternally
I can see you are all I need
This moment alone will remain, eternally
=^-^=
Sorry, But I also had to post these lyrics.. They are scary. It's Kettobase from Utada, too.
I want your baby
I want your baby
On this night that was filled with mistakes
I'm afraid an umbrella is only appropriate
It will hide my crying face
Recently, that guy
Has been leaving me hanging, and I've had it up to here
It's times like these that I'll grow up and show him
I want your baby
I want your baby
If I blame it on someone else
Won't that just make things harder?
I'll try crying for myself
I want your baby
I want your baby
I won't lay in wait for you
When yesterday comes back, I'll give it a swift kick!
Another day has passed me by
How can I reach you?
I'll become filled
With guilt, from my heart to my throat
Innocence was my only flaw
If it's not that important to me
I won't care
A bright personality backfires
I want your baby
I want your baby
I've started to lay in wait for you
When I look back, I'll give myself a swift kick!
Another day has passed me by
I'm going first, so sorry
Because it matters
When yesterday comes back, I'll give it a swift kick!
Another day has changed my life
Sorry for being at that selfish age
yyyyyyyyyeeaaa ^^
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Chu... Just read Stephi's journal.. Ack.. I wish I were her! I wish I could feel better from my eeeecckkyy ill struck week.. But I can't.. I got sick from being around my sick neice.. ::ugh:: I barley have any energy to type or write anything.. Which I guess it's a good thing that I forgot my NB of paper.. But, I only use that paper first.. I have a NB for 4th.. Which I write to most in..
I still can't get the "subject" off of my mind. It's bothering me so. But I find it easier to forget about it when I'm rushed with things to do.. which is 2nd adn 4th. During 1st, 3rd and Lunch that's all I think about. ::sniffs:: Why is it that none of my classes have tissues... ? What am I suppose to do? Sniff till I feel I can sniff no more? When my head and nose feel like they're going to explode?
Erm, anyway.. I've been going to 1st luch before third latley. It's really easy to do because my third is only diagnole from my Second so it's not like I'm rushing to get to that class or anything. Hector wasn't at his usually spot and I didn't wanna go inside to look for him for several minutes so I went back a few minutes into third and he wasn't there.. That sucked still.. Not much to write about today.
I'm bored during third because there is nothing to do besides update my journal for the first half of the class. Were going to be learning new stuff at the second half. ::sniffs:: For some odd reason I can't hear out of my right ear.. @.@; Well.. this is just jibbirish that I'm typing but I have nothing else to do to consume my time.
I was suppose to serve detetion yesterday and that is why Alicia and I stayed afterschool.. But I dind't serve it. I knew we were staying after today too, because Alicia had turtoring and i wanted to see my BF so I figured I'd just serve it today.
Then Alicia, stupidly, made the mistake of telling my mom I hadn't served it. I thought "Great Job Alicia!" As soon as she said it. My mom then persuaded to yell at me, and Alicia [ Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<who's>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] Chu... Just read Stephi's journal.. Ack.. I wish I were her! I wish I could feel better from my eeeecckkyy ill struck week.. But I can't.. I got sick from being around my sick neice.. ::ugh:: I barley have any energy to type or write anything.. Which I guess it's a good thing that I forgot my NB of paper.. But, I only use that paper first.. I have a NB for 4th.. Which I write to most in.. <br> I still can't get the "subject" off of my mind. It's bothering me so. But I find it easier to forget about it when I'm rushed with things to do.. which is 2nd adn 4th. During 1st, 3rd and Lunch that's all I think about. ::sniffs:: Why is it that none of my classes have tissues... ? What am I suppose to do? Sniff till I feel I can sniff no more? When my head and nose feel like they're going to explode? <br> Erm, anyway.. I've been going to 1st luch before third latley. It's really easy to do because my third is only diagnole from my Second so it's not like I'm rushing to get to that class or anything. Hector wasn't at his usually spot and I didn't wanna go inside to look for him for several minutes so I went back a few minutes into third and he wasn't there.. That sucked still.. Not much to write about today. <br> I'm bored during third because there is nothing to do besides update my journal for the first half of the class. Were going to be learning new stuff at the second half. ::sniffs:: For some odd reason I can't hear out of my right ear.. @.@; Well.. this is just jibbirish that I'm typing but I have nothing else to do to consume my time. <br> I was suppose to serve detetion yesterday and that is why Alicia and I stayed afterschool.. But I dind't serve it. I knew we were staying after today too, because Alicia had turtoring and i wanted to see my BF so I figured I'd just serve it today. <br> Then Alicia, stupidly, made the mistake of telling my mom I hadn't served it. I thought "Great Job Alicia!" As soon as she said it. My mom then persuaded to yell at me, and Alicia <Who's party was suppose to be today> and I aren't allowed to stay after school today. But, I am however, allowed tomorrow. Agh.. Lauren please serve detention with me so I am not bored out of my mind!!!! I love you! You are my special friend. Grg.. There's an hour left of class and I am starving because I woke up late and din't have time to make breakfeast or my own lunch.. But luckily, I have two dollars. Whee.. I'll share luch with Lauren. =^^= <br> GRGGGGGGGGGGGHH. I really wish I could talk about the subject bothering me so. But I can't. That and I don't want that many people to know. Lauren,Dane,Kearie and Hector are the only ones that know what I am so worried about. I'm not worried about it so much anymore, because I'm looking at it logically, instead of like "OMG that must mean it's a yes!" (changed words slightly as to not give it away..) I think well.. that could be because I'm sick, or because I didn't eat Breakfeast or Lunch.. and I think it's calming Hector down a bit. =^^= It's calming me down too, but still I am worried. Well, I have typed away so I think I shall depart now! <br> I luv you all ^^ Thanks to Dane, Lauren, Kearie, and Hector. Without your support I couldn't get through this. ^^; I luv you guys ::huggles::
<br>
(~_^)
<br> --Cindy-- |
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Tuesday, February 10th, 2004
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I hate having to do nothing but pointless busy work sense my teacher is leaving. @.@; Oh Well. I wish I could rant about a subject that is haunting me, but I don't want anyone to know that I haven't told unless it actually happens. And besides, I'd probably feel better not talking about this subject on a school computer. ... :Sighs: I can't stop thinking about it. I made a list of things I would have to do if it happened, and ways to prevent this scare from ever occuring again.
It was stupid. If I had ussed the brain I had, It wouldn't have happened. Well it would have, but it wouldn't scare me so. And it wouldn't be in a hurry.. No I would much prefer it not to be rushed.. Ah, I'm sorry if I'm conffusing you all. Don't worry, a Select few (Hopefully they haven't ratted me out) know. =^^=
I apologize to anyone I upset. I've been very emotional because I've been worried about this subject. I'm really anxious to find out if it's a yes or a no... Especially to Hector, I've been getting really upset latley. I love you, and I know your stressing too, and I'm sorry I added this "REALLY BAD" situation, quath one of my friends, to your worries. Don't worry, I'll be there for you, okay? I know your changing, and it's hard for you, and you don't know what to do with your life, but we'll figure things out together O.K?
I'm responsible enough for whatever happens.. Well, I better go. Time for luch.
I love you all!
If your really wish to know, ask me around the 27th..
More love to everyone.
--Cindy--
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michi_chan2002's journal
cranky.
worried.
blank.
bouncy.
disappointed.
horny.
amused.
anxious.